I'm Sick Of Hearing About Mouthwashing

Note:I was considering putting this to the side and moving onto something else, but I’m glad I decided to finish this blog post. I think venting my frustrations has helped me to come to peace with Mouthwashing. Thankyou for reading

I’d heard people talk about Mouthwashing a lot, mostly shipping memes and something vague about responsibility which gave me the impression that the characters were stranded on an island, and Curly took the "responsibility" of giving up his body for food. Already this idea alone was horrifying enough but oh, it could NOT have prepared me for the real story at all. I didn’t have the guts to play it myself, but I watched a playthrough, entranced, horrified, disgusted, glued to the screen, like a train-wreck you can’t look away from. And initially… I loved it.

I have such mixed feelings. I almost wish it had never been released sometimes. The dog shit from the bottom of my shoes have seemingly gained personalities and the ability to post on the internet. People have managed to take a story about misogyny and male violence, and unironically, or unironically ironically perhaps, made it about men kissing. The ability of them to be intentionally obtuse is so amazing it’s actually kind of awe-inspiring. Calling it "toxic yaoi" jokingly also kind of insinuates to me the idea that it's just another "problematic ship", rather than a spit in the face of everything the game is about.

In simple terms: This is not about shipping discourse. I am frustrated that people are being tone-deaf. I am frustrated with a culture that can't take anything seriously.

There are some other things about the game and its treatment I take minor issue with. I also think people are too eager to woobify the characters, which is still icky to me but whatever. Anya saying she believes someone's worst moments don't make them a monster is so heart-breaking, and it makes sense to me that she would try to redeem Curly in her mind; maybe if I was stuck in space and helpless I would too. I don't know. But I wish we saw more of what went on in her head, deeper characterization. I mean, we got backstories for Swansea, Daisuke, and Curly basically. My other complaint about the game itself is that some of the some of the hallucination sequence were dragged out for too long but that's not a huge deal.

In general “fandom” and “Mouthwashing” are words that just don't belong together. It leaves a bitter taste in my mouth (ba-dum-tshhhh). Had I not garnered such bitter feelings about the game I may have left largely unaffected by it for the rest of my life, and had I been able to avoid hearing about it for two goddamn seconds I may have not garnerered those bitter feelings. While writing this post and thinking about different scenes and stuff I began to remember how it initially felt watching, and I realized, there are things I still love about it. Maybe other people's responses haven't totally ruined it for me. I'm a big fan of dissorienting perspective changes that come together and make sense as the story goes along. Paradox Spiral is a great example of this--I want to feel as if I am on a roller-coaster when I read or watch stories. I really enjoy the aesthetic too; deep sunset, repetitive text, and the eerie hallucinated stretch of water.

In the end my question is...who is this story for? People who need to hear its message won't, and those who hear it don't need to. Is it supposed to be a cathartic peice?

I don't know. Artistically, Mouthashing is amazing, but as far it's accomplishments, all I can say is that it's made the nastiness and apathy in some people very clear.

3/2/25

Email alternative

After reading about lots of gmail alternatives I have come to the conclusion that the best one out there is Gofuck.Yourself. It's not adequate, but Gofuck.Yourself is completely ad free, donation funded, provides absolutely 0 services, and takes 0 seconds to sign up for. Mouth to rectum encryption. Privacy policies. No data. Gofuck.Yourself. Sign up for Gofuck.Yourself now. Do it. Do it. Do it.

2/14/2025

New Years Resolution

I decided to try two things this year I've dunked on before: New Year's Resolutions, and mindfullness. Increased mindfullness and better hygeine are my resolutions for this year. The reason for mindfullness specifically is not to better my mental wellbeing, but rather just to see if measures up to the hype. It's a little expirement on myself, haha. I have made some low effort to implement mindfullness into my life, but since I wrote a post on (redacted) about how I think it's way over-rated, I figured I should give it another swing before dunking on mindfulness again. Chances are I will still believe it's over-rated, but it's not as I think there's anything wrong with mindfulness itself. I believe it can be benificial. I keep thinking of "better" resolutions I could have gone with; it's hard to stick to one thing. I don't understand how people make YEARS long commitments to anything ever.

This isn't exactly a resolution but I'm also trying to shift my mindset to where I don't mind taking my time on things. I know I will never finish that project, get that job, or reach that art goal in the time I want or even need to; I've always been an incredibly slow person; so I want to take my time on other stuff I would normally put on the back burner, like cleaning, reading, or, y'know...hygiene. The time will pass anyway and it's better to procrastinate doing something that will make me happy rather than rotting in place and banging my head against a wall as I can't figure my shit out.

1/3/2025

The Good Old Times

If you're chronically online enough in the right spaces like I am you probably know there's been a resurgance of aesthetics from the early 2000's, aka, "y2k" (and also webcore to some extent). There's nothing wrong with these styles but the extent to which this romantisciztion has gone is getting a bit out of hand. I understand that everything is terrible right now. I don't fault you for seeking escapism. But pretending you live in another era won't fix it.

There was something this guy said, "I can't stand people who are stuck in the past and can't make something of themselves in the present" and it pissed me off at first because he was kind of dunking on 2000s fashion but I think I get where he's coming from now. The 2000s were not a good time for queer people or at least not from my perspective, and lgbt people romanticizing y2k as a whole always makes me kind of uneasy. Again, I'm not just talking about using mp3s and cutting your bangs ~like that~, I mean fully believing earlier times were superior to this one. Though I don't know much about what it would be like to live in the late 1900s it also applies there. Imagine being in that year for a little while if you must, but be honest about the fact that every era came with its downsides, and simply being in another year wouldn't necessarily save you. We should be trying to fix the present, not regress to the past.

1/2/2025